I was not
going to originally post anything about this, but I have been asked by a few
individuals (parents and students) if there was a way I could get more people
to hear it. They liked the message I had
delivered to their students. So, here it
is…
I was put on
the program to give a speech to the graduating seniors at their end of the year
banquet this past Thursday (6/12/14) night.
After not being sure what to say, I decided to go with what I believe
based on my experience moving from high school athletics into college athletics
and then life. I am a firm believer in
the power of character. By that, I mean
the word as an umbrella for all those other words that really fall under
it. The only trick was (as it is here)
not to get too wordy with the multiple personal examples I could give. Suffice it to say, I kept it vague (but to
the point) as I used to when presenting the sportsmanship award at my previous
high school. The speech in its entirety,
went as follows:
“First I want to thank you for the
opportunity to speak. I have a message I
want you to take with you after the awards are passed out and graduation is
over.
You
see, these nights are special to me for a few reasons, but mainly because of
the role sports played in my own life. Some of you know and some of you
don't...that I was lucky enough to participate in sports at a fairly
high level throughout high school and college. I learned many lessons
from my participation in sports that have helped me succeed in life. Among them were the ideas of
effort, character, how to win, and how to lose.
What I
consider to be the most important one is what I would like to see you all take
with you as you move on to whatever comes next in life. You have all
heard the saying, "It's not whether you win or lose, it's how you play the
game." Well, I want to add a little something more to that idea that
is more relevant in life. "It's not whether you win or
lose...ultimately; it's about acting with pride, integrity, and then what you
do with that win or loss.
As
athletes, you possess a distinct difference from those who have never had the
experiences you have on the field of competition. Personally, I remember
working through hot August days and late into the winter nights just to win
that important game or match. That feeling...that irreplaceable feeling
when you win. I also remember the other
side. That awful feeling of defeat. After working so hard to be
overwhelmed with that feeling of failure.
I came
to discover that in the end, whether you have won or lost is not really the
issue or even lesson. You have never been assured victory; so all you could do
is go out on your field and leave everything you had there. You know the
saying...blood, sweat and tears, but more importantly...heart.
Whether
or not you honestly gave your all is something only you truly know
and therefore, need to live with. I see it as the difference between losing and
being beat.
Close
your eyes for a minute. Think back to a
time when victory was not yours, but you poured every ounce of yourself into
the contest. While defeat is never easy, it was easier to get back up and
get back on track knowing you had done all you could. It just wasn't your time.
Maybe you hadn't prepared hard enough.
Now
think about that time defeat was expected.
You were losing and loss was inevitable.
Until you found you had more to give, didn’t quit, dug down and did just
that, and because of that...you won. Certainly, either way...you end up
winning if you learn the lesson provided.
I'm
not saying anything new….just trying for a different application as you
transition from the field to life. Teddy Roosevelt explained it by saying...
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man
stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit
belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust
and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and
again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does
actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great
devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the
end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at
least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those
cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.”
What
I’m saying as we honor you tonight is this...your participation in athletics
has given you an edge if you choose. You are moving on in life and no matter
your course, are going to experience wins and losses, but that is old hat for
you. There is a new world out there for you.
Use
what your experiences here as athletes at Seekonk High School have taught you.
Pick a dream, "dare greatly," and go after it. You may not
succeed, but who knows, you may surprise yourself. Either way, leave it all out
there every time and never quit. You may not always come out on top, but
whatever you do... don't lose... make them beat you.
One
last thought…as Mr. Forbes put it… “History has demonstrated that the most
notable winners usually encountered heartbreaking obstacles before they
triumphed. They won because they refused to become discouraged by their
defeats.” Take that lesson with you and
I promise you will be successful.
I
offer my most sincere congratulations to you.
I truly wish you the best of luck. You have made all those around
you, but most importantly yourselves proud. Now go out and continue to do just that.”
What’s
important is this…
Education,
all of it, is about creating and taking advantage of opportunities. Sometimes they are presented in the fashion
of a win; other times they come at what feels like the darkest hour. No matter which doesn’t matter if we are
mentally unavailable to recognize them.
As adults it is our responsibility to teach students the character,
mental toughness, and ability to go beyond their expectations, push through the
losses, and properly celebrate the wins.
There is a lot of personal background in this for me, which comprises
who I am today. But that is for another
post…
Your
comments on the importance of this subject are always welcome...
